The first step after joining a swinger lifestyle club is to write a profile. A good one ensures that other swingers will contact you for swinger dating and with sex party invitations. A poor one can condemn you to an empty inbox and a feeling that your membership has been a waste of time.
In this section of our swinger lifestyle guide, we provide some tips and advice on creating impressive profiles that other swingers will feel drawn towards responding to. We include the art of profiling for swinger couples as well as singles.
Start by creating a catchy, easy to remember user name. There are far too many 'Sexy2's and similar around. Make yours different so that it stands out from the crowd. It will attract attention and make other swingers more lightly to contact you.
The best swinger-dating profiles convey a sense of humour. The irresistible smile and flirtatious playfulness that are the vital ingredients for attracting others, can be written into profiles with the same effect. Just as no one enjoys chatting with dull, serious people; no one enjoys reading profiles which express the same.
Think carefully about the people you want to meet and then describe them in the profile. Be careful not to be so choosy that you are excluding some whom you might otherwise have enjoyed some really good swinging with. For example; when stating that you are looking for non-smokers, consider whether you would actually turn down some great sex with someone just because they smoked. Be especially careful not to make a list of your dislikes. Profiles that do are a big turn off to everyone who reads them and not just the people who the list is aimed at.
Describe your swinger lifestyle experiences. Even if you are a complete novice, it pays to say so and is always better than exaggerating experiences or pretending you have done things you haven't. In any case, there are a lot of swingers who are attracted to the idea of having sex with a lifestyle virgin. Everyone was a newbie at a certain period of time. Profiles that exaggerate experiences can often be quite easy to see through but even when they are not, the time of reckoning usually comes when the reader meets the writer in person. Other swingers will expect you to live up to the experience level you have described.
As with experiences, a good profile should include some of your sexual fantasies. Be careful though to limit these to ones that are likely to be widely acceptable within the swinger lifestyle community.
Before you publish your profile, take some time to consider what it would be like to be someone reading it. Ask yourself how the person you would be reading about (i.e. You) comes across. Do they sound confident or arrogant; playful or flippant; honest or insincere etc.?
Be sure to include a photograph. Profiles that lack photographs rarely attract any interest. Profiles with distasteful photographs attract distaste and profiles with out of date photographs waste time. You can read more about adding photographs to profiles in the swinger couple and singles profiling sections which follow.
Swinger couples should aim for their profile to come across as portraying a happy couple who are fun to be with. It is essential that they create the profile together as a couple and have fun whilst they are doing it. A lot of swinger couples compile their profiles as part of sexual foreplay. Doing it at this time can be a real turn on which will be conveyed to the profile's readers.
It is a good idea to feature some of your own bedroom adventures as well as your swinging experiences. Don't be afraid to write about your relationship with each other and explain how and why you decided to get into the swinger lifestyle. Other couples especially want to read about these things.
Most profile systems now have tick boxes for things like who you want to meet so there is absolutely no need to write things like, no single males in the profile itself. Regretfully, some couples still do, even to the point of emphasising their dislike by using capital letters and exclamation marks. Doing this kind of thing is as big a turn off as making the kind of negative list described in the section above.
It is important that swinger couple profiles include photographs of both partners. Profiles that include the male partner only are almost certain to generate one reaction from everyone who views them; something along the lines of: "What's the betting they are not a genuine couple !"
In addition to the advice given about including photographs earlier; by all means include explicit photos of you having sex but beware of overdoing it and including crude close-ups or unflattering images.
It is important for single males to understand what women who use swinger dating sites want. By 'women' we are including swinger couples here as well as single females. Women who want to enjoy the swinger lifestyle crave for adventure and excitement. Boring them by coming across as the nice and ordinary guy who they meet everyday isn't going to attract them. Self confidence, masculinity, humour mixed with a degree of mystery are more the kind of qualities your profile needs to project.
Sometimes you may need to remind yourself that you are not looking for romance or mainstream dating, long-term-relationships. If your profile ends up sounding like this could be your hidden agenda, you won't get many replies. It is equally important that you don't stress the purely physical side of things to the point where you sound crude or immature.
Always try to communicate your sex appeal in as natural a way as possible. Here again, be careful not to sound immature or crude. Never boast about having fantastic stamina. Women are likely to consider a long staying repeater more as a potential source of vaginal pain than a promise of ecstatic pleasure. Commenting on have a huge penis is not helpful either, especially on swinger dating sites like ours where there are tick boxes that take care of physical attributes like breast and cock size.
Always include a good, up-to-date, photograph that shows you well groomed and dressed as you would for a date or swinger party. Do not include crude close-ups of your erect penis or other types of immature shots that so often accompany single male profiles on swinger dating sites.
When it comes to creating a profile for a single female, most of what has been said in the general section and swinger couples section above applies. The only extra point to emphasise is that as a single female, your photo is going to be the most significant part of your profile. It will be the first thing other swingers will look at. This makes it essential to get it right. Never use an old photo or (worst still) somebody else's. Don't be afraid of looking too 'tarty'; this is swinger lifestyle dating, not romance dating! Dress (or undress) to thrill and only draw the line at the kind of close-up crudities we have advised against earlier.
This page is based on one of the sections of our invaluable swinger lifestyle guide:
Keys to a Successful Swinger Lifestyle.
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